Its a lyric from "Bore Da" by Euros Childs. it translates to "life is just a grain of salt in space"...obviously, it could be worded a lot fruitier but you understand the concept. It's true, how can I worry so much when I'm just a speck! My problems are miniscule really.
I'm now completely alone...in a good way! It ended so well, I couldn't have wished for a better conclude a very important chapter in my life. It's funny how I worried and avoided talking about it and then it was so easy...and right! And all the happy memories aren't tainted with anger or upset....it's perfect.
I refuse to worry about any of the recent issues anymore...as far as I can see it, if anything is meant to be, it'll happen, I've just got to let it! This week has been very challenging on my little heart though...and my brain actually, but I'm just going to concentrate on the wonderment that awaits me over the coming weeks! There's long Blondes on wed, Manneqiun on thursday, ting tings on the 2nd, back to Brum on the 4th and finally Adam Green on the 5th! I got 2 tickets for this, only 1 of me though...who to ask?hmm
Time travellers wife is beautiful. I tried to explain it to my mum earlier and there's no way to do it justice, its impossible to explain how amazing it is!
I'm glad I've started reading again, I've missed it. I'm no writer but I can appreciate a good book, which I'm very glad of. My sister hates reading so I'm glad I got the literature appreciation genes!
Note to self: Must do work, tidy room, wash and iron/organize vintage goop, make gwdi hw's and read more book!
Monday 24 March 2008
Thursday 20 March 2008
bubbles
this cocoon, caught in vesuvius' shadow
only the ashes remain
and i waited there for you
why couldn't you?
here we lie waiting for something to startle
to shake us from gravity's pull
and so sleeping hours are through
what can we do?
the sorry conclusion, the low dirty war, it happened before you came to
but this is solution, and this is amends
the joke always tends to come true
and there on your windowsill over the unmoving platoon
written in paperback, the view to the quarterback's room
under waning moon
this quiet serves only to hide you
provide you
what i knew
it'd come back to you
take this palm, follow the lines here are written
tracing the veins and the shapes
and feel your fingers falling slack and all folding back
the tainted election, the hole in the sky
command what is tried, what is true
without solution, with feet on the ground
it won't make a sound 'til you're through
so loosen your shoulderblades
this is your hour to make due
'cause there on the timberline
deep cold november shines through
soft and absolute
this quiet serves only to hide you
provide you
what i knew
it'd come back to you
This song can reduce me to tears. Its odd how you can listen to a song without giving it a second though, but then the lyrics jump out at you, they're beautiful...and some, very apt.
I'm now at a loss for words to describe my emotions...hope the lyrics kind of sum it up.
only the ashes remain
and i waited there for you
why couldn't you?
here we lie waiting for something to startle
to shake us from gravity's pull
and so sleeping hours are through
what can we do?
the sorry conclusion, the low dirty war, it happened before you came to
but this is solution, and this is amends
the joke always tends to come true
and there on your windowsill over the unmoving platoon
written in paperback, the view to the quarterback's room
under waning moon
this quiet serves only to hide you
provide you
what i knew
it'd come back to you
take this palm, follow the lines here are written
tracing the veins and the shapes
and feel your fingers falling slack and all folding back
the tainted election, the hole in the sky
command what is tried, what is true
without solution, with feet on the ground
it won't make a sound 'til you're through
so loosen your shoulderblades
this is your hour to make due
'cause there on the timberline
deep cold november shines through
soft and absolute
this quiet serves only to hide you
provide you
what i knew
it'd come back to you
This song can reduce me to tears. Its odd how you can listen to a song without giving it a second though, but then the lyrics jump out at you, they're beautiful...and some, very apt.
I'm now at a loss for words to describe my emotions...hope the lyrics kind of sum it up.
Saturday 15 March 2008
You and I Get Along Famously
I love neon neon at the moment...music is an amazing thing, there's nothing else like it, its the relief, cause and remembrance of all sorts of emotions. Its odd, how when you have one particular thought on your mind, the faintest lyric can cunjour up all the emotions of that situation, which you would otherwise pass by.
I'm in a bizarre place at the moment, somewhere between elation and misery...no, thats an over-exaggeration, but I'm really not sure how I'm feeling, well, I am, but I dont want to admit thats how I feel. I want to remain calm and collected, silent and mysterious, but I can't.
for now, neon neon will ease the confusion!
I'm in a bizarre place at the moment, somewhere between elation and misery...no, thats an over-exaggeration, but I'm really not sure how I'm feeling, well, I am, but I dont want to admit thats how I feel. I want to remain calm and collected, silent and mysterious, but I can't.
for now, neon neon will ease the confusion!
Tuesday 26 February 2008
is it safe to say c'mon c'mon
ok, so firstly, my last entry was a bit harsh, I don't hate my home, thats where all the people I love are, but it does take me by surprise how much I've settled up here.
Secondly, last night made me remember why I loved the von bondies so much! they're amazing....though, not really enjoying the new line-up, but better than nothing at all! The cider also helped me to rekindle those memories of von bondies obsession!
I don't have any expressable emotions at the moment, so Im just going to say what I've done since the von bondies!
I found out Adam Green is playing bar academy....whaaa!! Untitled Musical project were at the gig last night, and they played the super cool gig in Cassie's house, me and toby were at both of these events, therefore we are super cool?! Yeeeaaahh!
Tonight, I worked, it was a band called Mayhem, from finland. They were super scary, the singer wore a military outfit and a face curly moustache and lifted up dead pig heads and thrust them at the audience (they wanted to hack them up with swords, but health and safety wouldn't allow it...damn!).
I'm going to come back to this at a later date, as Im half asleep and babbling...like a brook!
sweet dreams sweet cheeks, oh tomorrow, oh tomorrow!
Secondly, last night made me remember why I loved the von bondies so much! they're amazing....though, not really enjoying the new line-up, but better than nothing at all! The cider also helped me to rekindle those memories of von bondies obsession!
I don't have any expressable emotions at the moment, so Im just going to say what I've done since the von bondies!
I found out Adam Green is playing bar academy....whaaa!! Untitled Musical project were at the gig last night, and they played the super cool gig in Cassie's house, me and toby were at both of these events, therefore we are super cool?! Yeeeaaahh!
Tonight, I worked, it was a band called Mayhem, from finland. They were super scary, the singer wore a military outfit and a face curly moustache and lifted up dead pig heads and thrust them at the audience (they wanted to hack them up with swords, but health and safety wouldn't allow it...damn!).
I'm going to come back to this at a later date, as Im half asleep and babbling...like a brook!
sweet dreams sweet cheeks, oh tomorrow, oh tomorrow!
Thursday 7 February 2008
being "home"
I wish I hadn't come back this week, I booked the week off work and hopped on down to cardiff, I've had a really nice time with everyone and its been amazing to spend time with graf but, Birmingham is like my bubble, where I find out about problems back home, but I can still hang up the phone at the end of it and almost carry on as normal, being home reminds me why I wanted to move away.....i'm just fed up. Family issues and constant negativity.....get me back to Birmingham, and Barfly and Fraggle Rock and the Storyteller and £3 day saver bus tickets and The Sunflower Lounge....and Snobs!!!
Edwinsford sucks
Edwinsford sucks
Friday 25 January 2008
new home?
The last couple of weeks have probably been the most stressful of my young life. I've looked at so many potential new homes and my brain has been permanently boggled...to the extent where I've found myself in floods of tears one moment and in fits of hysterics the next.
We found somewhere...its not my first choice but the more I think about it, this is only my home for a year...less than that when you take into account summer and christmas and easter. Its not like Im buying....its only rent. And, after looking at so many shit properties with shit agencies and landlords, I know it'll be fine...plus, I've read over the contract so many times, looking out for loop holes and sneaky things!
It's quite disheartening you know, not being able to trust people, thinking that not everyone has the same morals as me, that some people don't feel guilt.
On a lighter note, my car is gone, live on luigi! This has left me £785 richer so whoop whoop to that! I do however, need to find another car...which is proving trickier, the lower my budget gets!
On an even lighter note, I'm working on the night of the Art Brut gig!!! whhhaaaa, I get to meet art brut...can you believe it!?
I'm done!
This blog has been so pointless...I'm sorry to have wasted your time reader.
xx
We found somewhere...its not my first choice but the more I think about it, this is only my home for a year...less than that when you take into account summer and christmas and easter. Its not like Im buying....its only rent. And, after looking at so many shit properties with shit agencies and landlords, I know it'll be fine...plus, I've read over the contract so many times, looking out for loop holes and sneaky things!
It's quite disheartening you know, not being able to trust people, thinking that not everyone has the same morals as me, that some people don't feel guilt.
On a lighter note, my car is gone, live on luigi! This has left me £785 richer so whoop whoop to that! I do however, need to find another car...which is proving trickier, the lower my budget gets!
On an even lighter note, I'm working on the night of the Art Brut gig!!! whhhaaaa, I get to meet art brut...can you believe it!?
I'm done!
This blog has been so pointless...I'm sorry to have wasted your time reader.
xx
Saturday 8 December 2007
boggle
I had never really been to the funeral of a close relative until friday. I don't know if its something that everyone experiences but after we left the chapel and the service had ended, all the upset, all the anger and frustration just seemed to leave me. I can honestly say I've never felt so peaceful.
The service was perfect, lighthearted and a true celebration of her life. I had such a feeling of dread about it all so it was such a relief to be part of something so positive instead of the sorrowful event that funerals usually are. Jean Wilkins, they did you proud.
They began cleaning out the cupboards today, of all her clothes and little bits and bobs. I took some scarves and thought nothing more of it. It wasnt until I tried them on that i realised how much her scent had remained on them. She hadnt worn these scarves in at least two or three years, yet it was as if she'd just put them down. U never really notice a person's scent until it out of it's natural surroundings I don't suppose. It was very comforting.
It's been possibly the most boggling week of my young life. I've had a million thoughts and feelings about a million different subjects and so much to do in a short space of time. The feelings haven't dissappeared like I'd hoped but I have no choice but to "go with the flow" as they say...I hate that saying, it sounds really cheesy and....crap, just an easy way out of an awkward situation. But, in this case, it truly is the only thing to do.
I'm missing Birmingham very much...it's not so much the city but the little cwtch that is halls.
It's bizzare. I know that my brain is swirling with confusion, yet I'm feeling so content.
x
The service was perfect, lighthearted and a true celebration of her life. I had such a feeling of dread about it all so it was such a relief to be part of something so positive instead of the sorrowful event that funerals usually are. Jean Wilkins, they did you proud.
They began cleaning out the cupboards today, of all her clothes and little bits and bobs. I took some scarves and thought nothing more of it. It wasnt until I tried them on that i realised how much her scent had remained on them. She hadnt worn these scarves in at least two or three years, yet it was as if she'd just put them down. U never really notice a person's scent until it out of it's natural surroundings I don't suppose. It was very comforting.
It's been possibly the most boggling week of my young life. I've had a million thoughts and feelings about a million different subjects and so much to do in a short space of time. The feelings haven't dissappeared like I'd hoped but I have no choice but to "go with the flow" as they say...I hate that saying, it sounds really cheesy and....crap, just an easy way out of an awkward situation. But, in this case, it truly is the only thing to do.
I'm missing Birmingham very much...it's not so much the city but the little cwtch that is halls.
It's bizzare. I know that my brain is swirling with confusion, yet I'm feeling so content.
x
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